Slipping
by Juular
Summary: Rikku has always loved her cousin, and Yuna feels like she'll never love again. A confession, and a little desperation, can do funny things to a person . . . -oneshot- YuRi !Edited!


_Okay, I slipped up. _Colorful _was a fail, probably one of the worst stories I've ever written – still not as bad as _Stigma_, which was horrific. I thank_ Kanari674 _for her criticism, and have taken months to write this story, hoping to make it satisfactory. This is an edited version.  
_

Tears. Hot and burning like acid. They pour down my cheeks, searing my flesh. Their heat is fueled by the burning of my own soul. It has destroyed my heart and is setting to work on my body. I try and stem the flow, but it's useless. So what do I do? I fall to the floor, too weak to even carry myself to my own fucking bed.

I'm shaking where I lay, curled up into a tight ball. I try to calm myself, try to say that everything will be all right. I yell at myself to shut up. How drastically I changed in so short a time.

In under five minutes I went from shock, to anger, and now . . now I'm a wreck. My head swims as I remain nearly motionless. Except for the trembling, anyway. Confusion, shock, denial, rage, sorrow. All muddled together and spinning around and around. Each constantly swirling about my head. Each one surfacing respectively before being ripped away and replaced.

I screw my eyes shut and manage a few choked breaths. A few broken sobs. I try and move, try to push myself up, but my arms are weak like rubber. My legs, too. I can't pity myself. All I can do is hate myself for being so fucking stupid! Hate myself and . . hate . . hate . . can I hate . . _her_? Can I bring myself to? _She_ did this to me! _She_ sent me spiraling into self-destruction!

But can I hate someone that I loved only thirty minutes . . an hour ago? That I have loved for years? When they only did one thing wrong to me? One thing to truly hurt me? Well, when it's something this devastating, then maybe. But I still don't know.

I still don't . . .

_One hour ago . . ._

_The ship is empty. By some sheer stroke of luck, bless the Fayth! I feel so giddy. For years now I've loved my cousin Yunie. I don't care what anyone thinks. I love her. She is perfect in so many ways. She can cheer me up when I'm down, she's always there to comfort me when I need it. She's beautiful, and so damned cute, too! _

_I want, no, _need_ to tell her. I've been waiting for so long. I have felt this growing anxiety. She thinks of me as a close friend, a loving cousin. But, oh, if she only knew! How I love her so much more than I should love family. But I don't care at all! With the way she acts around me . . I'm almost positive she'll return my feelings. _

_I've been bottling up how I've felt for two years. Ever since I met her, I felt something for her. Something stronger than friendship, a deeper bond than family. I've felt true, unbridled love. I stood by her side through thick and thin, even when she fell in love with Tidus. Sure it made me sad, but I could still be her friend, right? She was happy, what right did I have to be selfish? I was, am, her best friend. And for two years that's been enough. _

_Well . . not anymore!_

_I can't hold back a giggle as I pace through the engine room. Not the ideal place to think 'cos of the fuckin machina, but I don't mind. The heavy rattle and roar is almost soothing to a skilled mechanic like myself. And the normally unbearable heat just reminds me somewhat of Bikanel. So, it's actually the perfect place for me!_

_I'm trying to think of how to tell her how I feel. How to break it to her. My excitement tends to cloud my thoughts, so I have to spend extra time thinking. I have considered just _hinting_ to her, _seeing_ if she'll catch on. That's stupid, she is a little naïve, but _only_ a little. And she'd _never_ think that I was trying to say _that_. Also, I've been pretty much doing _that_ for the last two years!_

_I shake my head in frustration before finally just resolving to do the _dumbest_ thing I could think of: just _telling_ her. Brilliant! _Not_! I sigh and try to sugarcoat the only idea I have. I'll just let her down slowly. It winds up becoming a combination idea. I'll use less subtle hints while trying to explain it to her. If all else fails, I'll just have to tell her. _

_Finally satisfied – after much time-consuming deliberation – with my "plan", I head out of the engine room and onto the lift. My fingers are trembling as I reach to press the button for the cabin. I pause and take a deep breath to try and steady my nerves. I don't want to come across as _too _hyper. _

_After somewhat steeling myself, I press the button and the lift lurches to life. The ride seems agonizingly slow, and I can't help but bob up and down on my heels as it ascends. By the time it reaches the cabin I'm pretty much _jumping_ up and down. I almost dash out into the mini-hall but stop myself and take a few deep breaths._

_I walk into the cabin, trying to act as nonchalant as possible. I don't see her on the first level of the cabin and head for the stairs. A little more than halfway up I can see her at the far end of the cabin, sitting on the couch and reading a book. I resist the urge to call out her name, but I want to _feel _her eyes on me, I want to _see _the beautiful hues as they light up simultaneously with one of her_ dazzling_ smiles._

_I feel my heart beating wildly in my chest as I approach her. I feel beads of sweat on my forehead and the need to do something crazy is growing. She still hasn't noticed me. I'm walking very quietly like I normally do without thinking about it._

_She finally sees me and smiles, "Hey, Rikku," she closes the book and sets it down on the table, hands folding gracefully in her lap. "Everything all right?"_

_I swallow and nod, "Uh, yeah. Everything's fine, Yunie." I start rubbing the back of my neck absentmindedly. A really annoying habit of mine. "I was, uh, wondering if I could talk to you?"_

_She shrugs, "Sure," and gestures to the chair closest to me. I move a little too fast, almost jumping into it. She arches an eyebrow, but I just giggle nervously, fighting down a blush. "So," she gives me a sly little look, like we're co-conspirators in some devious plot, "What did you want to talk about?" She asks. I love her voice. It's sounds so sweet. Quiet and gentle. _

_"Um, it's about someone on the ship," I say cryptically._

_Yunie tilts her head to the side, something she does when confused that I tend to find unbearably cute, "What do you mean?"_

_Uh-oh . . what _do _I mean? I struggle to come up with something that would still be a hint, but not too obvious, "Um, I think I may have feelings for someone on the ship." _

_Her eyebrows raise, "Really?" She asks, shocked. "Well . . uh . . wow!" She laughs lightly. It's like a merry, tinkling music to me. I melt at its sound. But I don't want her talking to some dopey puddle, so I shake myself and focus on what she's saying. "Why come to me?"_

_This time I arch an eyebrow, "Do you really have to ask?" I giggle. "Paine wouldn't care, I wouldn't feel right talking to Buddy; Shinra . . well . . you know . . and Brother," I shiver, "That'd be a nightmare waiting to happen!"_

_Yunie starts to laugh again. I can't help but laugh with her, it's infectious, "You've got a point, Rikku," she agrees. "So, who is it?" Yunie asks._

_I sigh, "I don't really feel comfortable saying their name, just yet."_

_Yunie nods, I can tell she's trying to figure it out. I know who she's gonna suggest before she says a word, "Buddy?" She asks._

_"I'm not tellin'!" I say, crossing my arms over my chest._

_Yunie shrugs, "Fine. You said you think you might. So, does that mean you're not sure?" I nod, a total lie. I _know_ I'm in love with the girl I'm talking to! "Okay, then, how do you feel when you're around them?"_

_"Well . . happy. Warm, like I always wanna be close to them."_

_Yunie nods, "Okay. What else? What do you like about them?"_

_I grin, "Their voice. The way they laugh. It just melts me, you know?"_

_"Is that all?" She asks._

_I shake my head, I'm already getting sidetracked as I start to think of all the things I love about her. "Their eyes. Their kindness always gets to me, how she-" I stop dead. I start to hope that Yunie didn't notice it. _

_Fat _fucking_ chance._

_Her eyes widen, "'She'?" She asks. I swallow and start to try and think of an explanation, "You think you're in love with a . . a girl?" _

_I close my eyes tight and nod, "Yep."_

_She's silent for a few seconds, and then she says, "Well, if that's what you're into," she giggles._

_My eyes snap open, "You . . y-you're o-okay with . . it . . with it?" I stammer, hope rising inside me, burning wildly like a fire. _

_She shrugs, "To each his – or, in this case, her – own. I don't see any problem with it. It's love, right?" She asks, throwing me a wink._

_I just nod stupidly, "Yeah."_

_She smiles, "Well, then it's fine by me." Then she frowns. "Wait, so it's Paine?"_

_Oh . . _fuck_._

_She might just prove to be not as naïve as I thought. Well, it's due in part to the _failure_ of my entire plan, "I . . uh . . well . . um, actually, it's . . you see, I . . ." I sigh._

_Shit._

_"No," I squeak, hanging my head. _

_"But, you said it was someone on the ship, right? A girl? And besides Paine-" She stops._

_She figured it out. _

_I look up slowly and see her staring ahead, face blank, skin pale. "Yunie?" I ask. Her eyes flick towards me and I smile weakly. "Just . . give me a chance to explain, 'kay?"_

_Her lips start to tremble, she licks her lips and says, "Rikku," her voice is a breath. "Do . . how could . . you . . mean me?" She asks, stumbling over her words._

_I nod, "Yunie, please don't freak out. Just let me explain . . please?" I whimper. She hears how my voice falters and nods slowly. "I know that a lot of people think it's wrong, but I can't help it. Yunie, I only feel love for you. _True_ love, not some crush or anything. I care about you, and I just hoped that you'd . . care about . . me, maybe." I say, looking hopefully into her eyes._

_My whole world jumps, it seems. Like a projector faltering. Something changes, like a different reel is being played in the stead of the old one. Yunie slowly seems to calm down and then shocks me utterly by smiling._

_She stands up and walks slowly to me. I look up into her eyes and see something growing in them. A look of warmth, one of love. I'm too stunned to move, but she lowers herself to eye level with me. She brushes her fingertips across my skin lightly, moving some of my blonde hair away from my right eye. It's useless, the hair just falls back. _

_Her touch doesn't feel real, though._

_She leans forward and her lips ghost across my own, but it's like smoke on my skin. Unrealistic; false. Something doesn't seem right. Nothing seems to fit where it should. Her lips press to mine, but it's like a cold air hanging on me. Then something snaps._

_**This never happened! She didn't kiss me! She destroyed me! She didn't come to me, she walked right by me. She just l- . . she left m-me . . .**_

_My mind screams at me, but it's not my mind. It's not my imagination. Back in reality, I'm still crying, and now I'm screaming. _

XXX

I've never felt this bad in my life.

I hurt her, I know I did. I just walked away. Almost _ran_. How could I be so _heartless_, so _cruel_, when one of the things she said she admired most about me was my _kindness_? Maybe I should have tried to just talk sense into her. I mean, there's no way I could ever return her feelings. She's my cousin, and a girl to boot! And I love Tidus. I always have, and I always will.

The fact that she loves me, though, sends shivers down my spine. It's kind of creepy when I think about it. I can't even imagine what it would be like to love her. I just . . it's not a possibility to me. Completely out of the question! How did she ever fall in love with me in the first place?

I just don't see how I . . or she . . oh, my mind is just so muddled right now! After I left her, I ran to the lift and took it straight to the deck. I guess I was hoping the open air would help me think. But . . it doesn't look like it. Ever since I got up here it seems like the confusion has grown and grown.

I cried.

For the first few minutes I cried. Silently, mostly out of confusion. It's stopped now, but the tears are staining my cheeks. I sniff and watch the clouds drifting above. The clouds we normally fly with now look down at us, laughing at our earthbound selves.

I hug my legs closer to myself and look out at the city of Luca that the ship is docked at. The hundreds of people milling about in the streets, the sounds of civilization reach my ears. I rest my chin on my knees and sigh.

I wonder how she's doing. How did it affect her? I just left her. After she confessed that she loved me and said that she hoped I'd _feel_ for _her_, too. I didn't exactly reject her, but that's probably how she felt. There's no telling just how bad it hurt her.

How bad would it hurt me? If Tidus just left me like that? Or what if I was in a situation like Rikku's? If I loved someone, and told them, and then they just left, what would I do? I can only imagine.

I've felt so alone these past two years without him. I have all these pent up feelings and emotions inside of me. And to keep them bottled up like I am is hurting me.

_So, what? You'd just use your cousin_? I feel a stab as the thought runs through my head. _No! _That would be cruel. And wrong. I think sick is a good definition. I shake my head, try to dislodge the thoughts. It doesn't work.

I start to think about Tidus. Will he ever return? Will I find him? Or is this whole search just in vain? I _want_ to be loved, and I _need_ to love. It's killing me, this solitude, this loneliness. I hate it. But there's nothing I can do about it. I'm stuck like this no matter what, apparently.

I feel an overwhelming flood of sadness rush over me. Filling me from head to toe. My teeth clench and my body starts to tremble. I try to fight what I know is coming. I try to hold back the emotion, the pain. But it's to no avail. I shake as the first sob hits, the first gasp as tears burn their way from my eyes and scorch valleys down my cheeks. I suck in air through my clenched teeth and my body shakes with each sob.

It's one of the worst feelings in the world. The horrid sorrow that runs through you like a venom, eating away at your insides. Destroying your heart and soul as your pain flows from your eyes. You want it to stop, you pray for it to stop, but nothing listens. Nothing complies.

I take in a few shuddered breaths and let them out the same way. The crying slows, but the ache that fills my heart, that rots a hole in it, grows. I feel almost empty. I feel so alone.

_Tidus . . why won't you answer when I call? Why have I been cursed to be alone like this?_

I unfold and lay down as the sobbing is reduced to mere shaky breaths. I try and calm myself down, think about all the good things that have happened to me. None come to mind. My own mind betrays me and shows me memories that hurt me.

I try to remember my first kiss. The time in Macalania. I remember . . pain. Sorrow. The same feelings that I have now. Only he had been there to comfort me. To hold me, help me, _love_ me in a way that I had only dreamed. I realize that the reason for my feeling so empty is that I need comfort, love. The warmth of another human being.

_You gave up the only chance you had._

The thought confuses me. What chance is it talking about? With a sickening realization I know. It doesn't take long to figure it out. I shake my head, physically denying what my mind is telling me. There is no way that I would ever . . .

_Even to end this?_

I'm desperate, and I know it. But I refuse to sink so low as to seek that kind of _comfort_ from a same-sex relative. I push the thought out of my head. Or at least I try to. But it's like a virus. It latches onto me and won't let me go. I press my hands to my head and groan in frustration. Why isn't there another way? There has to be. What I am telling myself to do is unthinkable. Cruel, even. It's _betrayal_.

_Betrayal of whom?_

Myself. Tidus. Even Rikku. I can't allow myself to do what my conscience is now telling me to do. But even my imagination begins to work against me. It shows me images of Rikku and I . . the visions almost make me sick. Just the thought of . . _touching_ her like that makes me feel . . wrong.

But the images keep coming. Scenes of love. Comfort. _Pleasure_. I whimper at what I'm seeing. What I am now feeling. I'm slipping closer and closer to the edge. The question is, can I grab on and pull myself back up? Or will I fall?

I am seriously doubting myself.

I hold my eyes shut. My hands ball into fists. I weep out of sheer frustration. I am not going to lose a battle of wills to my own perverted desires!

XXX

I clench my hand, and then unclench it, somewhat glad to be back in reality. I don't care if I was seeing what I want, I know it was fake, so there's no point in letting my imagination run away with itself with now idiotic fantasies.

My vision is blurry and my face feels hot. My heart is broken, and my anger is fading. I can't blame her. She has Tidus. _Had_ Tidus. She loved him and I selfishly tried to get her to love _me_ when I should have _known_ it was stupid.

With a single sob I wearily try and push myself up. My arms and legs tremble and I fall back down with a yell of frustration. I didn't think it would affect me this badly. But, then again, I love her so much. And to know that I'll _never_ be able to express that love, never be able to _be_ with her. It's a horrid thought, and an even worse feeling.

I grit my teeth and try to push myself up again. I manage to stand, but my head swims and I catch hold of a nearby chair while it clears. After a few deep breaths I make my way to my bed and collapse on it in a heap, only to curl up again on top of the covers.

I close my eyes, hoping to sleep – a deep, dark part of me hoping to die. I push that thought away quickly. Once my eyes are shut, the scenes of what previously happened play out again in my head. I shake my head and open my eyes.

Now my subconscious mind is working against me! I grab a fistful of the covers beneath me and crush them in my hand out of frustration. I still feel angry, and I need to vent it, but I can't. I don't feel like getting up. I don't feel like doing anything. I just want to sleep, hoping that serene darkness will overtake me.

I close my eyes again, praying for some release.

XXX

The deck is hot beneath me, burning my skin, forcing me to sit up, even though I'd welcome the burning as a sort of punishment. I let out a pained sigh and look back up at the sky. I wonder how my cousin is doing. Did I hurt her? How did she take my now very obvious rejection?

I want to go and check on her, but I'm afraid. I'm afraid that she'll hate me. Afraid of what I'll do in my desperation. Thoughts and visions still tempt me, and I'm losing ground, I'm quickly losing the war. In the end, curiosity gets the better of me, and I push myself up with a quiet sigh.

I wipe my eyes before turning and heading slowly for the door to the lift, dreading what I'll find more and more with every step. I move even slower in the tiny room behind the door, hesitating before the entrance to the lift. I step slowly inside and look at the pad with the destinations on it. My hand raises and my finger hovers over the button for the cabin. I can't seem to push it. I'm still reluctant. Still apprehensive.

My finger touches the pad and the lift whirs to life. It moves slowly downward until it reaches the cabin and opens. I step out and make my way through the tiny hall and through the second door.

I walk cautiously towards the stairs, moving as quietly as possible. When my foot first lands on the step I pause. My doubts, worries, and my rising wants colliding, but I push it all aside and start moving upwards. The stairs seems almost higher now, like a mountain. It's my anxiety. But, I still move on, and finally I reach the top.

Rikku is lying on her bed, curled up, and shivering. My mouth hangs open and I walk silently to her bedside. Her face is red, she's obviously been crying. I feel guilt stab my heart, the cold blade tearing through me, shredding flesh and soul alike.

I take a step forward and crouch down beside the bed. I find myself reaching out, and can't stop. My fingers touch her shoulder and her eyes snap open, making me fall backwards.

Her spiral eyes regard me coldly, "Yuna," she says quietly.

It pains me to hear her use my real name, and not the pet name she seemed to always use, "Rikku," I croak. I clear my throat and move to where I'm kneeling beside the bed. "Rikku, I . . I'm sorry. I shouldn't have just walked out, I should have tried to explain."

"You love Tidus," Rikku says. She sounds so sad. "You don't have to apologize," she says wearily. Her eyes move to the covers beneath her.

"Yes, I do."

"No. I do. I was being selfish. Insensitive. I only cared about what I felt, only childishly assuming that you would want me." Her eyes move back to me. "That you would love me like I love you."

I reach out and gently lay a hand on her arm, "I'm sorry, Rikku." I whisper, trying not to cry again. "I didn't want to hurt you . . I was just so shocked . . and now . . I'm just so confused now," my forehead lowers to the bed and I feel my breath catch.

"Yuna?" Rikku asks. I can't answer her. My body starts to shake all over again and I begin to weep. "Yunie?" She breathes. She sounds scared.

"I'm sorry, Rikku. I just . . I don't know! I feel like I'm so alone. Like I'm never going to be able to love anyone, or be loved by anyone, ever again. And I-I-" My words dissolve into sobs.

XXX

I don't know what to think as I watch my cousin break down. Hope? Fear? Guilt? It was my confession that did this to her. I hurt both myself and my cousin, my best friend, the one I love.

I slip off the bed and sit beside her, my back to the bed. I try and reach out to comfort her, but she turns her back to me and continues to cry. I lay a hand on her shoulder and slowly I hug her from behind. I lean the side of my head against hers and feel a single tear roll down my cheek.

What she had said was so similar to how I felt. Like I'd never be able to love anyone truly, like I'd never be loved. I felt alone, and so did she. I silently wish that she'd just give it a chance.

XXX

Her arms around me shock me. I didn't expect her to care. The closeness brings comfort, and my mind wanders to how her breasts are pressed into my back. It kind of scares me, though, how much I find myself welcoming this. She gently rubs the side of her face against mine, and I freeze.

"Yunie," she says softly. The way she says my name scares me.

"Rikku?" I whimper.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel this way," she says just as softly as before.

"Um, Rikku, I, uh-" I struggle to think of something, anything to make her stop. And something to make me stop wanting this!

I can feel her gently nuzzling my ear, so gently it almost tickles, "Yunie. The way you're feeling . . I feel the same. Like I'm alone. Never to love. Yunie, we don't have to feel that way," she purrs.

I start to shiver and turn around to face her, but find that a mistake. Her eyes are shining with a tender love that I've only seen once before, and it makes my breath catch with another sob. I know she can see the fear in my eyes, but she doesn't know what the fear really is. She doesn't know that I'm afraid I really _want_ this.

Her fingers dance up my arm, but I can't stop her. I'm paralyzed. Half of myself wanting this, craving the contact, the love. The other half is screaming at me to stop her. But it's too late. I'm no longer slipping.

I've already fallen.

She moves closer to me. Both her hands are on my arms. As they reach my shoulders, she moves close enough that I can feel her breath on my lips. My chest feels like it's about to explode, and I feel myself wanting to dive in to kiss her. It isn't until her lips finally meet mine that I seem to lose focus on reality. That I truly realize how much I want this. _Need_ this.

So soft, like warm velvet, and she's _squirming_ against me, fingers _burning_ my arms. My eyes droop shut, an overwhelming flood of emotions cascade through my mind, heart, and soul. Warm and soothing, and cold and shocking. A brilliant explosion that fills me.

I feel her lips move against mine as she whispers, "Please, Yunie. We both need this." She backs away and my eyes open. She stands, but gently picks me up too. She presses herself close to me, full against me, and a shudder sweeps through me.

She kisses my lips again. The gentle touch making me shiver with a new source of excitement. But, at the same time, it brings up a painful memory. My first kiss in the lake. Am I betraying him? He's gone, and it feels to me like he is never coming back. But still, am I betraying his memory? More like I'm betraying _a_ memory. But I realize that it's just me trying to make myself feel better.

I feel her hands move to my sides and pause there for a moment as her lips linger on mine. Finally, I feel her hands move up to the front of my neck, and a moment later my hood falls to the floor. She traces a finger along my throat and takes her lips from mine.

I see her eyes flick down and feel my cheeks flush. Her hands leave me, but I don't look down, my eyes are locked with hers, and I can't break the gaze to save my life. Then I feel her hands on me again, on my waist. They slowly move up and go beneath the soft, white fabric. Her gloves are gone, that must have been what she was doing. Her bare hands press lightly to my skin as they travel up, taking my shirt with them.

I start to tremble as she pulls my shirt over my breasts, and then over my head. She drops it to the floor and her eyes go down again. Now my face feels like it's _burning_. How can I be doing this? How can I be _letting_ her do this? She looks me in the eyes again and first takes off her scarf. She then slides her sleeves off before her arms go behind her back. Seconds later her bikini top falls to the floor. I think I gasp, trying not to look, but I can't help it. My eyes move down, and my breath catches.

Her breasts are not exactly big, but they look perfect – a thought I can't even _believe _just went through my head! She moves closer to me, her chest presses to my own and I breath in sharply. The feeling of skin against skin is new to me, and the added fact that it's a girl, and my cousin, makes it even more otherworldly than it should be.

In those first visions I had seen, the mere thought of being pressed to Rikku like this made me sick. But now, it is completely different. It is _incredible_. She's so _warm_, so _soft_, and her eyelids flutter over green, _inviting_ irises. Her hands are on my arms again. They remove the bracelet from my left wrist and the two padded cuffs higher up on each arm.

She backs away and kicks of her boots, "You too," she says, smiling coyly. Still in a slight state of shock, I comply. Almost like I'm half awake. Once both boots are off, Rikku wriggles out of her short skirt. I had frequently found myself looking at the way the straps of Rikku's thong hugged her hips. I always found it kind of . . erotic. Now I stare with wide eyes and open mouth at her lithe, tight body, seeing it in a whole new way that _excites_ me in a way that it _really_ should not.

She takes off my belt and unties the layered half-wrap around my shorts and lets them both fall to the floor. She presses closer to me, drawing a strangled sigh from my lips as I feel her gently kiss my shoulder. It shouldn't feel like this, not at all! I should be _appalled_, not turned on! More than even that, my heart should not be swelling the way it is! She removes my shorts and her kisses trail down to my chest to just above my breasts. I feel my skin crawl with a mix of excitement and fear.

I blush again as she removes my final article of clothing, leaving me completely naked. Then her hands go to her thong, which she swiftly discards. She places a hand flat on my stomach, I can feel her shaking. As I look into her eyes, I see it's from excitement and anticipation. Her hand gently pushes me. I swallow and let her guide me to the bed, disgusted with my own passiveness. She doesn't lay me down, instead she sits me down and kisses me, though this one has more energy to it. It is bolder.

One hand reaches around my head and runs through my hair as she pulls me further into the kiss. I wrap one arm around her back, the other hand I lay on her leg. Her second hand is on my stomach, but it slowly moves upwards.

I feel her lips part, and I open my own mouth slowly. I moan lightly as our tongues mingle for the first time. She explores my mouth slowly, seeming to match the speed of her hand which pauses below my breasts. Her hand moves down from the back of my head and her fingertips begin to knead the back of my neck.

In her actions there is now an obvious question. She's contemplating what to do. She's come this far, but my guess is that she still barely knows what she's doing. Working off instinct, more than anything else.

Until now I've barely moved on my own. She initiated this, she's been the one guiding me, it seems. Though, I don't know any more than she does about what we're doing. My hand moves from her leg to trace around her waist to her back. I run my hand up, trailing the length of her spine with my fingers. She lets out a number of short gasps.

I lay down, taking her with me. I'm overcome with a sense of desire. To feel her. _Kiss_ her. I want to _taste_ her. A small part of me says this is wrong, but I don't listen. Lust burns my blood and demands to be satiated. I lower slightly, my lips finding her neck. I let my tongue brush against the soft flesh of her throat, making her sigh.

Her arms wrap around me and pull me on top of her completely. I'm face-to-face with her again. I lean down and kiss the corners of her face, trailing along her jaw and to her mouth, again. Her tongue is immediately at my lips, and I let the dance begin again. This time it's urgent, all teeth and tongue as she forces her mouth on mine. I melt into it, moaning as a wave of unfettered _want_ crashes into me. Greedily, I give in.

I feel a leg slip in between my legs. She presses it lightly to me, making my grip on her tighten. She smiles as she kisses me, enjoying my reaction. But soon enough she writhes beneath me as I do to her what she did to me. She breaks away from the kiss and lets out a soft moan, her eyes shut tight.

When they open again, they reflect something that I think is lust. She smirks and whispers, "Again." My eyes widen slightly, but I comply. I press my leg to her, and she moans again. The sound is almost unbearably _erotic_. It sends a shiver throughout my body. My gaze moves to her chest and I find myself lowering. She looks down at me, somewhat confused. My breathing quickens and I circle my tongue around one of her nipples, already stiff. I graze it with my teeth before running my tongue over the bud, enjoying her reaction.

XXX

I was surprised when Yunie took the reigns. It was . . kind of unlike her. But I couldn't complain. Not with how I felt. Joy, mixed with pleasure, ebbed through me like the tide on a beach. Her tongue on my breast, her leg in between mine. One of my hands is pressed firmly to her back, I move the other one to her head and run it through her hair before moving it back down to her neck.

For me, nothing matters now but what I'm feeling. My love for her only grows as her every touch sends new sensations through me. I feel her let go of my nipple. But she licks it again, swirling her tongue around it, over it. It's just concentrated _wet _and _warm_.I bring my leg up sharply between hers. She bucks, her hips jerking up, her back arching, as she gasps suddenly.

I run my fingers through her hair again and giggle, "Did you like?" I ask playfully.

Yunie shudders and takes a deep breath before looking up at me, "Well, I can see why you asked for me to do it again." she says slowly. I nod and wriggle beneath her so that I'm now face-to-face with her. I gently pull her down. My lips brush hers. We kiss again. She's more tentative, and I go along.

I feel a burning between my legs. She ignited the fire. She filled me with lust with that touch. It just made me want more. I break away and lift my head so that my lips brush her ear.

I purr a whisper, all breathy and low, into her ear, and she shivers against me, "Let me show you something." I say. I don't look her in the eye, I just wait. She nods slowly, and a grin breaks out on my face. "Try to pay attention, if you can, 'kay?" She nods again, and slip my hand down to her groin. She starts, her body stiffening for a moment as I let my fingers linger where I can already feel she's wet and waiting. I loop my arm around her neck, holding her close and steady. Without waiting or explaining I push a finger in, making Yunie's back arch and her breathing quiver. "Now," I whisper, "just," I crook my finger, and she sucks in a breath, releasing it in a moan. "Think you can remember that?" I do it again, teasingly, and her gasp turns into a choked yell. She nods, and I remove my finger. I take hold of her hand, lacing our fingers, and guide it down to my own vagina. She's trembling nervously, and I remove my arm, letting her look me in the eye.

"Y-You're sure?" She asks, searching my eyes for approval, for direction, for assurance.

"A hundred percent," I say with a wink. "You can use two fingers, too." I add, taking hold of her middle and forefinger, positioning them over me. "Or three," I switch my grip, pressing her middle, ring, and little fingers together. "That leaves your thumb and forefinger," I demonstrate, reaching up and using mine to play with her clit. Her jaws clenches, and her back arches at the spike of pleasure I know went through her. The thought occurs to me, what I just did, and who I did it _to_. "Think you got it?" I ask one more time.

She looks me in the eye and nods, not even trying to hide how nervous she is, "I-I think so," she stammers. I feel my heart melt, and run my fingers through her hair soothingly. She swallows, hard, and sinks her fingers into me, her two free fingers going to my clit. She experiments for a little bit, nervous and curious. All I care about are the bright, glittering explosions behind my eyes and the fact that _Yuna_ is doing this to me. This is all the sweetest dream come true, but even that burns away as the white nothingness courses over me, _swallowing_ me in its immeasurable depths. Then it's like a jolt of lightning, sharp and strong, when I cum. I can hear myself gasping, feel the coating of sweat on my body. The pleasure goes like the tide, sweeping away after obliterating everything in its path.

My eyes roll around in a dazed state before locking onto Yuna's. She looks scared, "You screamed," she whispered. "I-I . . I didn't-" I kiss her, not needing words to express my love and my gratitude. When we break for air I thank her, smiling against her lips as I pant hotly.

"You were perfect," I assure her tenderly. I run my fingers over her sides, wondering how I can repay her. It needs to be special. I need to _show _her just how much I love her.

"I was so worried," she murmurs, nuzzling my cheek gently, placing a short kiss here and there. I don't think I've ever been this happy, before. That makes it all the more imperative that I aptly reciprocate. An idea comes to me as my head begins to clear.

"Don't be." I whisper seductively. "You won't be sorry." Before she can ask what I mean, I slide a hand beneath her and push lightly on her belly. She lifts herself, and I take the chance the change the position so that I'm on top of her. The very thought of it makes me shiver with delight.

I kiss her lips once. Then I move on. I trail my lips down her jawline to her neck. I move slowly down her throat, letting my tongue caress the smooth flesh, and loving the taste of her. I linger over her pulse for a bit, getting a moan from her. I finally reach her collarbone, and my left hand moves to her right breast.

My fingertips dance lightly over the soft skin, teasing her. They play around her hardened nipple. I look up, and see that she's watching me with an expression that's a cross between pleasure and anxiety. I smile and kiss the top of her left breast gently. My heart is pounding furiously. I want to move faster, but I don't want to just dive into something. She's scared enough as it is.

But, then again, aren't I, as well?

Not as much, maybe, but my fingers are undeniably trembling, no matter how lightly, as they grace across the skin of her breast. I lower my lips more and kiss her nipple. I part my lips and my tongue darts out, just brushing the bud. Yunie still jumps.

"Why are you so scared?" I ask softly, not looking up. "You did this to me just a minute ago." I run my tongue over her breast. Tracing it around her nipple, feeling her skin, tasting her, reveling in the joy of touching her like this.

I'm starting to tremble more, now. I'm getting excited with the though of what I'm about to do. I move back up and gently kiss her lips. I gaze into her beautiful, mismatched eyes. I ask the question with both my eyes and my voice.

"Yunie, do you trust me?"

She swallows and nods, "Yes," she breathes. I smile and then slowly begin my descent.

XXX

I sigh as I feel her kissing her way down my neck, her lips pass over my breasts and slowly trail down my stomach. They touch softly to my skin, the feeling so foreign it makes me shiver. But yet, I find myself welcoming the feeling.

I feel the bed shift and, looking down, I see that she's slid onto the floor. For a moment I'm confused. I have no idea what she's doing. But as she smiles wryly up at me, an evil glint in her eyes, it sinks in.

She parts my legs with her hands and lowers her head. I look back up at the ceiling, silently panicking, my conscience all too late regaining its composure. I feel her tongue on me. It glides slowly around my vagina, making me shudder, and wet at the same time.

I feel a fiery burning in my legs. I groan and instinctively push my hips upwards. She giggles. I feel a sudden, unexpected rush of pleasure and moan, my hips bucking. She giggles again and her tongue moves once more over my clit, drawing a second, similar reaction.

I feel one hand leave my leg, and her tongue moves down, and then she pushes into me. I gasp, not expecting this . . well, not really. As she explores, sighing herself, her hand starts to move over my clit. Each finger working separately. Flicking and rubbing almost randomly, it seems. I have never even masturbated before, and it was a strange thought that the first vagina my fingers ever breached was not my own, but my cousin's.

My breathing heightens, and my vision clouds over. I begin to groan slowly, not stopping but for a shuddered breath. I feel my arms and legs start to twitch. My hips are moving slowly with the motion of her tongue, and jerking with every touch from her fingers.

An explosion of sensation, like I've never felt before, rushes over me. It momentarily cuts off my hold on reality. I think . . I think I scream. Once my senses return, I find myself gasping madly on the bed. My whole body feels limp and weak.

Sweat is coating my skin, and my legs, the space between, especially, feels even more soaked. I whimper and clench and unclench my right hand. I feel the bed shift, and Rikku slides up next to me.

She's grinning madly. She brushes strands of my hair away from my eye and kisses me. I'm near unresponsive, but she doesn't seem to mind. "Told you that ya wouldn't be sorry!" She whispers giddily.

She helps me reposition myself on the bed, so that my head is resting on a pillow. She then wraps her arms around me and presses herself close before closing her eyes and sighing. I know that this was all she wanted, to be with me and feel that I love her. Just like how I felt with Tidus, but that . . that seems far away, now.

"I just want you to be happy, Yunie," she whispers. "I love you." When she looks up at me, a single tear is running down her cheek. "I really do." She lays her head back down and closes her eyes. This renders me speechless, and I feel my heart break for her.

I'm tired, and weak. And yet, I can't seem to rest. My body feels drained, but my mind is wide awake. It's reeling wildly. Now that the pleasure is over, now that the satisfaction gone, I start to doubt; start to wonder. Did I really fall? Or am I still slipping?

I look down at Rikku and, though I'm starting to believe this is what I want, I'm nervous to find that I'm still not sure. And it scares me to think that I may never be. But it's love, this . . this is love . . .

Right?


End file.
